T.O.P.S.

No, we don't eat eyeballs for Christmas.

Well, there seems to have been a lag in Things Only Parents Say... because I haven't had to say very many odd things recently. :-) So to extend today's post, I will give a small update on Eden as well as an exciting venture I wish to undertake.

Eden... Oh my, how cute she is! She's 14 months now. Walk instead of crawls. Loves to climb into little chairs and up the stairs. Lights up at the sight of her brothers. Squeals both in delight and anger. Can cop quite the attitude or throw quite the tantrum (can we say GIRL?). She knows where her eyes and teeth are. Loves doggies. She LOVES her Da-da. Her first discernable babble-words are "uh-oh," "dah-doo" (thank you), and I think "dah-dee" (doggie). She has a great capacity for facial expression that can melt you or make you roll on the floor laughing. And probably the latest skill mastery that has kind of shocked us is that she can mostly feed herself. Just this morning, she had a bowl of oatmeal with VERY little assistance. She does such a great job!! It's nice to see that I'll soon get to eat my own food without doing the "bite for you, bite for me" method. But it also feels too early to say goodbye to that stage! She's just over one! ::sigh:: I love my baby girl. Thank you, Lord, for doing YOUR will and not mine. I always said I never really wanted a girl. He knows best!

As for this new venture... For a long time, I've always wanted to impact teen girls in the area of purity. If there was any reason I ever wanted to be involved in a youth group somewhere, it was that reason. Well, that hasn't really worked out due to moving so much and now to current life stage. But I had an inspiration this last week and realized on Sunday -- I should write a book. If I can't be directly involved en mass with youth girls right now, maybe I can work on putting down on paper what I want to invest in their lives. So, here's the working title:

The Virgin Heart

I know. Kinda makes me nervous to use such a blunt word. But it catches you, doesn't it? There are lots of great books out there on sexual purity, and that is a passion of mine as well. But, praise be to God, I did not have a huge struggle staying pure sexually for my future husband. The area I struggled in was purity of heart -- maintaining a Virgin Heart. It is completely possible to give your heart away, whether you intend to or not, without even being touched by a guy. For this book, I would like to infuse Scripture and the principles we can draw from it concerning purity of heart with the four foundational stories of my Heart's life. Two are guys I gave my heart to, one intentional and one non-intentional. One is a guy that forever holds my heart and body (Love you, Hun!). And the last is the One who eternally holds my heart and soul and deserves all glory for what I've learned from these relationships. Please pray for me to have wisdom as I try to write this book. I hope it comes together and is not another one of those "oo, that's a good idea" that fizzles out. Might take a while since I do have lots of other responsibilities. And if it never gets out there, then the Lord had it as an exercise in my meditating on His wonderful creation of our hearts and giving us the capacity to love Him and others.

Life is but a vapor.

When I got the call from my sister that her mother-in-law had passed away, I immediately felt the tears come. But there was something else deep down inside that began welling up. I don't think I've ever sobbed so hard so quickly. I'm not sure my heart knew what to do -- it was beating at a very rapid, odd pace. Judah happened to be with Matt and I, so he got a clear picture of fresh grief which Matt had to explain. After a while, I was able to regain composure... then the more sober processing began.

What must it be like for Rich, Marta's husband, to lose the love of his life? What was it like for Autumn to have to wake her husband up to tell him his mother was gone from this earth? What is it like for Andy, Emily, and Ben to no longer have their momma to call or be with? For Erik, Hailey, and Noah to not get to see Grandma anymore?

She's free from pain and tears. And we are left with pain and tears -- grief. I'm thankful for the emotion. I'm thankful God gave us tears. Grief and tears help us humans process. And I'm also thankful that the grief over losing Marta is not life shattering. It seems to be a very thoughtful, sweet grief as we remember the woman she was. So full of joy, friendliness, passion for Jesus.

Tonight, as we were going through many photos of Marta's life -- from childhood to present day -- I was struck with a fresh understanding of two Scriptural principles. Life is but a vapor, and the Lord has numbered our days. Staring at the flirtatious young redhead, the 80's dressed pregnant mom, the mother of the bride, Grandma with her kiddos... Only the Lord knew that all of her days were adding up to this past Sunday when she met Him face to face. She was moving through her life. All around her were moving through life. Not one of us knowing when she would step into eternity. Sixty-one years. Seems like a long time, but I know that for many who love her, including myself, it seems all too short now. Especially Rich. But according to the Lord, it was the perfect amount of earthly life for Marta Bruckman.

Let this serve as a motivation for us to make the most of each moment. Cherish your spouse. Take time for your children. Speak kindly to all. Enjoy the life God has given you. Do your work heartily as unto the Lord. Help when you can. Make it all count as much as possible. Love God with all of who you are. Give your Creator glory with all that you can muster.

Your days are numbered.

T.G.I.F.

While watching Little Einsteins in which the instrument of the episode was a French horn, Judah logically asked, "Are French horns for people who speak French?"

As we were sitting at the table eating breakfast, Elijah was being pretty silly. He was waving his arms around then all of the sudden stopped mid-air. "I'm paused!" Did you just say "I'm PAUSED!"? "Yes." Gone are the days of "I'm freezed/frozen/froze." It's been modernized.

To get some background, listen to this clip from Brian Regan (and disregard the lame graphics). This week, I received my first moment referenced in this little sketch. The boys were playing outside. Judah comes tearing through the front door into the kitchen where I am. "Hey, Mommy!!!" (pause) During the pause, he raised his hands in front of his body as if to calm me down. "Don't worry." (pause) Uuhhhh....you better start talking, son! I don't even remember what happened, but it wasn't serious. Thankfully!

We discovered Elijah calls bookmarks "nookmarks." Ironically, that exists, too.

Judah was pretending to be Superman, complete with blanket cape hanging down his back. He "flew" to the doorway of the kitchen and in a deep voice declared, "I'm Superman!" I played along. I went over to him and put my arms on his shoulders and cried, "Superman, save me!!" He held up his hands and said (still in a deep voice), "Uh, hold on. I have to go save someone." ::speechless:: What am I, chopped liver?? I'm your MOTHER! :-)

Monday Meditation: Family, Builders, & Termites... Oh my!

Life motto ad nauseam: "Life is an adventure." That's what I always say. And I generally have stories to prove it.

Take the past couple days for instance. This week was going to be a pretty calm week in a sense that there was not much going on at all out of the norm. Just a fun lunch with Grandma Robin on Wednesday. All of the sudden this is what my week holds and the stories behind how this week's schedule came to be:

FAMILY

Finalization of tickets for my grandmother and little sister to arrive here tomorrow. Sudden but oh so fun! Nonie is coming to care for her mom (my great grandmother) as she has been having some heart trouble this past week. Nonie will come back to stay a night next week before returning to her home. Hope is coming just to spend two weeks with our family -- so fun and so helpful to us as we keep trying to get settled!

BUILDERS

The work on our home seems to have been dragging out longer than we expected. Sounds normal, though. :-) We haven't seen Bob the Builders for a while, most likely due to the rain we've gotten lately. I found out this morning that gutters will be done tomorrow morning and garage doors mid-day. Woo hoo! And speaking of garage doors...

TERMITES

I knew Terminix would be coming today to do a routine pest spray because we have a small ant problem and a weird rolly polly problem (they used to be cute until I started sweeping up about 15-20 per day...and can I say I am SOOOO thankful none of my children like to pick up small things and put them in their mouths!). So I wasn't alarmed at the knock on my door between 1:00 - 3:00. Expecting a man, I was a little surprised to see a woman. You don't really ever see a bug woman, just the "bug man." What surprised me even more was when she said, "Hi, I'm Dawn Marie with Terminix." I'm sorry, what did you say? "Uh, I'm Dawn Marie with Terminix, here to do your free termite inspection." I'm sorry, did you say your name was Dawn Marie? "Yeees?" As in d.a.w.n. m.a.r.i.e.? "Yeeees?" She was pretty hesitant at this point. Is Marie your middle or last name? "Middle. ??" I finally explained (and apologized) that I was quite shocked... because that's my exact name, too. We had a good laugh, and I tried to become un-awkwardified so as to move on with the appointment. And became clear that she was not here to spray but to give the free termite inspection that comes with any Terminix service (who knew?). But that's not all. The next surprise came when she found evidence of active termites in the garage door frames (which are being ripped out tomorrow, perhaps Providence?). May I educate my readers and say that in order to purchase this foreclosed home, it had to pass termite inspection -- and it did. So someone fouled up. (Please submit the following days to prayer as we try to sort through this and hopefully not get docked a sum of money for treatment. The Lord's will be done, though.) Hence, add termite treatment to Wednesday. **ADDENDUM** The "bug man" was just here. Not only did he ask if I was tired and point out the dark circles under my eyes, he also complimented me on my laptop and giggled throughout his time here as he remembered the new term "rolly polly." He said his vocabulary is ever increasing. I said "rolly polly" is more quaint than "pill bug." Despite the ick in this world, sometimes it can be so fun to interact with strangers! It's refreshing when you find a few who are a pleasure to meet!

3) Hubz is bringing home three co-worker friends for lunch on Friday -- I'm looking forward to it! He works with some great guys, and one of them I haven't met yet... the one who gets to share a cubicle with my Love!

Add to that small group and band, normal duties of wife and mommy, 3 nursing covers, house management... We're full up, Sweetcheeks.

But I'm gonna roll with it. Because God is in control. He has written each page of my story. I've been through crazier weeks (like the one before our big move!). And I'm alive, well, happy, and growing. Shoot -- I even got up early and did yoga this morning! Started the day with an answer to prayer, that I would start meeting a new goal!

Oh yeah. The HVAC guy is supposed to be here in 30 minutes. I need to figure out dinner. And the prospect of me being able to read for small group tonight is looking VERY slim now.

Keep focused on what is of supreme importance, and life with be an overall joyous adventure!

But seek first HIS KINGDOM and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. - Matthew 6:33-34

T.G.I.F.

Whew... it's been a while thanks to the move!

While sitting at lunch, Judah randomly asked me what my favorite kind of lobster is. Lobster? What on earth, son. "I don't like any kind of lobster." To which he replied, "Red lobster is my favorite." Elijah piped up, "BLUE lobster is my favorite!" Judah asked why lobsters are red. Uh, well, I think they turn red when they are cooked. Do you mean red lobster or the restaurant red lobster? "There's a restaurant called red lobster??" Yes, they have really good cheddar biscuits. Elijah, "Cheddar CHEESE biscuits??" They're called cheddar bay biscuits. "Cheddar biscuits with CHEESE in them?" ... A pointless, random, confusing conversation ensued. But funny. :-)

I was playing with the boys on their bedroom floor before their bed time. And by "playing," I mean laying there while they put cars under my splayed-out hair to pretend it was a "car wash" for the cars. Hey, it's relaxing to have your hair lightly tugged and stroked! All parties were benefiting. ;-) After a while, I popped my head up and all my hair was hanging in front of my face. Elijah started using both of his hands to get the hair out of my face and finally matter-of-factly stated, "Mommy, you so HAIRY!" Hmm. Thanks, 'Lij. :-P

T.G.I.F.

We were driving home from Target with the windows down since it was so nice out. As we were going slowly through the neighborhood, we could hear the evening songbirds. I asked the boys if they could hear them. "Yes!" Judah suggested that maybe they were looking for their family. I said maybe they were looking for dinner. Elijah? "Yeah, they're having chicken nuggets for dinner!"

There's something about picturing a songbird dining on chicken nuggets that just seems...wrong.

Thursday TOPS

I would never feed us poop.

Tippy Tuesday: Pockets 'n Pants

Could someone please explain to me why infant (or even young toddler) pants have real pockets? Really...what infant is going to stick their hands in their pockets while they lay around? All the pockets do is bunch up and get in the way. So I decided to remedy this non-necessity on Eden's jeans. It's very simple to do and can be done with or without a sewing machine!

First, turn the jeans inside out. Smooth the denim and pocket as best you can and pin through the layers to make sure it will stay flat on the right side when you are finished. Snip the pocket away from the side seam, but do NOT cut through the manufactured curved line of stitching that attaches the pocket to the denim.

Next, whether by hand or machine, sew a curved line ONLY through the two pocket layers and below the manufactured curved stitching. If you sew through the denim, you will see the stitching on the right side of the jeans. Cut off the excess pocket fabric (pinking sheers help with fraying).

Repeat on the other pocket. When you turn the jeans right side out, you will have nice, smooth FAKE pockets. Now when I put Eden's jeans on her, there's no digging down inside tiny pockets to smooth them down her legs. No bunching -- just quick cuteness!

T.G.I.F.

Judah, from the living room, "Are these Eden's socks? No, these are her kankee pants." Then he walked into the room holding the "kankee pants" mid-air by the toe. They were tights. I have no idea where he got "kankee pants" out of tights.

Elijah to Nurse Elaina, "Do I get a shot today?" He really wanted a lollipop. "No, no shot today. Do you WANT one?" Elijah nodded his head yes and had a very thoughtful look on his face. "In my bones. Because they are tight and won't hurt. My knees are bones. But I don't want a shot in my knee. I want one here." as he pointed to the front of his shin. Uh, I think a shot in your bone would hurt MUCH worse than in your muscle! But Elaina affirmed his thought process as creative. :-)

I told Judah to go upstairs and get dressed while I finished feeding Eden her breakfast. He called down from the top of the stairs, "Mommy, I don't think I can wear this guinea pig shirt. It's too small." My mind raced through his wardrobe, wondering what on earth he meant by guinea pig. I asked him to clarify. "I can't wear this guinea pig shirt because I think it's too small." I told him I couldn't think of any shirt that had a guinea pig on it. Maybe he meant size? We did watch G-Force a while back. Maybe he was trying to be cute saying a guinea pig sized shirt would be too small for him. Then it hit me and made me chuckle. "OH! You mean your Razorback shirt?" He said yeah, and I assured him it would fit. That's for all you Arkansans! Woooooo, guinea pigs!

Thursday TOPS

Remember, TOPS stands for Things Only Parents Say.

Please pull your underwear up so your wee-wee is covered.

Don't lick the packing paper.

Get your legs out of the cereal box.

Oops...I just stepped on the cheeseburger. (on the bathroom floor)

Stop laying on that shelf. (I should have finished with "You are not a Zelf!" Anyone know the reference?) ;-)

Wordless Wednesday: The Latest Style in Decor

Monday Meditations: Thoughts of Home

As our move gets closer, I'm starting to see various emotions quietly rising within myself. I'm thankful that they are not strong enough to appear outwardly but are more for my personal reflection and dealing. Sometimes it's nice to have private moments with my heart as I process this huge transition in my family's life.

And here I am sharing those private moments. :-) I feel that I've kept them to myself for a sufficient time.

Things I will miss that I never thought I would miss this much...

-Seeing bunny rabbits and all kinds of birds (with an occasional groundhog or deer) romping through the backyard. It has been so sweet to be so close to God's creation in this way. Especially those bunnies in the spring. I don't think I would ever tire of seeing them!

-The neighborhood kids, though even if we stayed here, I think others are moving soon anyway.

-The neighborhood adults. This is the first place we've lived where we've gotten to know our neighbors. Not on a hugely personal level, but I could tell you about the families in 10 homes around us. (Maybe I'll profile them in a future post for posterity.) One of our prayers when we moved here was that God would give us opportunity to get to know even just our next door neighbors. He answered...and exceeded. (Please pray with us for the same to happen in our new neighborhood!)

-I must give a special shout out to missing my Home Boy Jamie -- a fellow stay-at-home (dad) Arkansan across from our house. He and his family have been fun to know and good for our boys to play with for the exposure to inter-racial friendship as well as interacting with someone who has a speech impediment. They sure do love 10 yr old Dante and have not a care in the world that he is hard to understand. If only we all could learn from children and their ability to overlook differences. ::tries to stay off soapbox and keep focused::

-The quietness.

-All the trees.

-Easy access to walking trails and "our" park.

Things I never thought I was missing that I realize are going to be wonderful...

-A garage. I have NEVER lived in a house with a garage (that I remember anyway). Won't ever have to bring groceries or kids inside through the rain or snow. Bikes will no longer be in my entryway. No more clearing snow, ice, or pollen off the cars. Which leads to...

-A driveway. We've never had a driveway in our married life. We get to wash our cars in our own driveway! WOW! A place for my kids to ride in circles or play games without being in other people's way on the sidewalk.

-A pool. Seriously...the pool is a mystery to me. I STILL have random moments when I say to myself, "Oh yeah. I forgot. It has a pool. Really??" I'm thankful for those moments because it shows me that the pool was not the selling point for me. But really? I have no idea what it's going to be like to have a pool in MY backyard (or the cost of maintenance for that matter...). I'm so glad I have "lifeguard" under my job belt! At least I'm not totally in the dark about pools. :-)

-A porch. A nice place to sit while my kids play in the fenced in front yard. No more sitting on random railroad ties or standing around.

-A guest suite. I'm still so humbled that the Lord would allow us to have a home that has a guest suite in it. No more moving cribs or beds around to fit an air mattress or telling people they can either sleep on the couch, get a hotel, or stay with our friends.

-Our own mailbox. First time in our marriage to not have one blocked with other people's.

-Non-creaky stairs.

-A laundry room UPSTAIRS. Oh my word. Is it really going to happen??? My Hubz has always been dead set against it for liability reasons. But a couple weeks ago, he all of the sudden asked, "What would you think about moving the laundry upstairs to the small room?" ::picks self up off floor:: He was serious. And tonight he even called our plumber friend from church to talk about the process and when it will happen. ::stunned:: For REAL? No more hauling hampers up and down stairs? Are we really about to mostly remedy the chore that seems to be the number one enemy of my back?? Which leads to...

-New MATTRESS!!!!!! After 7 years of sleeping on a $50 king sized pillow top mattress that the Lord seriously blessed us with by way of a second hand store, He is allowing us to get a new mattress. Are we really about to maybe completely remedy another enemy to my back?? (And, thanks to the Lord's timing, we were able to get a free queen mattress for the guest suite!)

Things I had no idea would cause so much mental strain...

-Choosing a washer and dryer. HAS to be the HARDEST decision in this whole process. Maybe even harder than the house itself. Dumb, right? :-P But really, when you think about it, the washer and dryer are probably my most used and needed electronic servants. So to be the one choosing to spend the money on the two machines I will spend A LOT of time with for hopefully many years...daunting and overwhelming. Especially with the myriad of reviews out there on brand, front loader vs. top loader, drum size, noise level, reliability, etc. etc. ETC. It seriously could drive one's self insane.

-Um, I really think the washer/dryer has been the biggest point of stress for me. Get back to me in a few weeks after we've gone through contracting work at the house as well as the actual move. ;-)

This Monday meditation is meant to be a picture of how we are to give thanks in ALL things. How God cares for the big things AND the small things in our lives. If He cares for every sparrow and lily, how much more does He care for His children? I mean, really, a mailbox? Who cares about a mailbox? But it's just proof that we can and should take delight in the small things just as much as the big things. All that we have is from Him. He has given us an abundant life. We would be remiss if we took advantage of it and did not ponder just how incredible His detailed care is.

Am I scared of moving into this house? Yes. Why? Because this is a HUGE step for our family, especially financially and from a home management perspective. But need I be afraid? No. Why? Because we have prayed for wisdom and guidance time and time again throughout this process and have kept open hands and hearts as best we can tell. And God has promised to give wisdom when we seek it and has promised to guide our steps if we seek His will. His fingerprint is all over this purchase and move. ALL the glory is due to Him. The people involved, the exact timing of every phone call, the babysitters, each home we chose to see...He orchestrated it all. I pray we never forget how much we learned of our Great & Good Provider during this time. And I pray that we will have many years of thanking Him and giving back by way of hospitality to many!

Starting with our out-of-town families in just two weeks! :-D

T.G.I.F.

I overheard Judah and Elijah getting dressed one morning. Often times, they consider things a race with each other. Judah chanted, "I'm the champion!" Elijah, loud and angry, responded, "NO YOU NOT! GOD is the CHAMPION!!" Judah simply said, "No, He's not." Elijah - "YES HE IIIIS!!!" Made me have a little chuckle before addressing each son's issue. :-P

We had cantaloupe with dinner the other night. I think it must be the first time I've purchased one in the boys' "grown-up" life. They enjoyed it, 'Lij more than Judah. Towards the end of dinner, Elijah ever-so-sweetly asked for more "neb-uh-loaf." Still later, he called it meatloaf. SO cute!

Thursday TOPS

Brian Regan has a funny act where he talks about how there are some things that only a parent can say. Hence, I will occasionally have "Thursday Things Only Parents Say" (Thursday TOPS). Same concept as my TGIF's, only this will be a collection of those sentences throughout my week that I can't believe I had to say to my children. They may not seem so funny at first glance, but if you REALLY thing about it... you'll realize that only a parent is blessed enough to say them. :-) I've also realized that TOPS will be comprised of negative statements -- just shows that TOPS occur solely because kids will be curious kids!

Stop playing with the toilet handle. It's not a toy.

Stop banging on the washer. I don't care if it sounds like thunder. Don't do it!

It's probably not a good idea to stand on that balloon (could also read "car carrier").

Don't vroom your cars into your little sister.

Would you please stop dancing around naked?

It's rude to sniff other people's bottoms.

Take that diaper off your head.

You may only bring cars that don't fit under the oven into the kitchen.

Monday Meditations: Ways vs. Steps

Wow. Do you ever have one of those days where you knew it would be full, but you felt that it would run smoothly under control? And then it ends up being NOTHING like what you expected. You planned your ways, but someone (or Someone) else was directing your steps?

My day today was like that.

I expected a couple loads of laundry, at least one packed box, a shower, school for the boys, and the regular meals and kids thing.

Status update 12+ hours later? One full basket of clean/folded clothes upstairs on my bedroom floor. One overstuffed basket of clean clothes on my kitchen floor, half folded and the rest shoved on top (since it's two loads in one basket). A load of towels drying in the dyer -- to be left until morning, no, tomorrow afternoon. One half-packed box creating a narrow passageway with Matt's closet to our master bathroom. Two meager worksheets done with the boys. No shower. But we're all fed and still alive.

So what on earth happened in between that prevented me from finishimg what seemed to be a very accomplish-able To Do List? A lot. Much of which was unexpected. Here's a list:

-::thinking:: Ok, so I can't really remember my morning. All I know is that whatever happened, I ended up not getting Eden out of her crib until 11:30 for lunch. I usually get her at 10:45 or 11:00. :-P

-Quick jaunt to take some cookies to a dear friend (to give her the cookies AND to get us out of the house)

-"Naptime" which ended up being two hours of persistent disobedience including talking, whispering, laughing, sneaking out of bed, nakedness, overturned water bottles, silver permanent marker scribbles on my desk... Naturally mingled with not-so-perfect responses from me as I tried to hang on to loving discipline.

-Oh, and don't let me forget to mention that DURING naptime, a neighbor lady who is from Ivory Coast (and speaks very cool French) needed to use my phone/internet because hers was down, so she was here for about a half hour. Which only fueled the boys' disobedience since they thrive on being social (especially the oldest). And I had to battle my own dumb imaginations of what happens in the movies when you let someone you are only acquainted with into your home. Go away, Satan. I WILL be hospitable -- especially to a woman I have taken to Safeway a couple times, spoken with occasionally, and truly believe she is at least religious and moral.

-An phone call at 4:00pm from Lender Lady 2 saying we need this info NOW in order to keep an impossible timeline for closing within reach. An email at 4:06 from Lender Lady 1 "freaking out" about not having said information 5 days ago and shedding serious pessimism on our already twice extended close date. "Oh, and we need this info by 5pm." (It is incredible the amount of communication that has to happen between multiple parties when buying a home -- sheesh! It's no wonder we're confused about who needs what info, when, and how final!) So mucho phone calls to Lender Ladies and Contractor as well as a string of emails later, things were finalized at 5pm. Or was it 5:02?

-Meanwhile, once again, sweet happy Eden was left in her crib 30+ minutes longer than her usual afternoon nap. Picked up, put in her highchair, and given some juice so mommy could keep working on the real estate stuff. And break up the fight over the coloring book with a lecture to Eldest Son about his latest streak of selfishness. Not a perfectly delivered lecture either.

-A phone call at the start of the Coloring Book Fight from dear cookie friend thanking me for the cookies and asking if I could watch her son so she and her Hubby could go visit some friends with new babies. Of course! I would never say no to that unless I was seriously impeded! (Cookie Friend, you'd better NOT feel bad for asking after reading about my day. If I didn't want to or couldn't, I would have said no. I promise!)

-Throw some eggs and waffles on... knowing Hubz won't be home until 7:15 anyway.

-Feed Eden and myself quickly, leaving the boys to finish their dinner and Eden in the high chair while I go upstairs to wash the makeup (from yesterday) off my face and change out of my pjs (yes, at 5:50pm...they could pass as lounge clothes...) for Cookie Friend's arrival to drop off Cute Kid.

-Leave table uncleared and just GO OUTSIDE, get some fresh air, let the boys run a-muck, and wait for Cute Kid to arrive.

After that, things seemed to calm down a bit. Especially when Hubz got home and I pretty much washed my hands of my disobedient boys for the day. Praise the Lord for him! Three kids in bed, and some sweet time spent building Trios with Cute Kid. Why am I still up? Because I just finished scanning about 20 pages of real estate documents we had to sign and send back tonight. And I needed to debrief my brain with a Monday Mediations. Which is...

A man may plan his ways, but the Lord directs his steps.

The day is over (literally in 11 minutes). It was entirely imperfect both in how it did NOT go according to my plans and in how I responded to a few of the situations contained herein. But the day is over. God knew everything that would happen and how it would all happen in just a few short afternoon hours. From an earthly perspective, my day was out of control. But from a heavenly perspective, God was in total control of my day. Reminds me of an awesome quote my pastor gave yesterday:

It's not "Let go and let God." Grab hold and let God!

So if you ever have a day like mine, remember that God is in full control and knows the exact purposes He has for you in each situation that comes your way. Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand. -Proverbs 19:21 Your responsibility is to trust Him and keep taking steps of faith. Grab hold of Him and let Him lead you through it all!

I've heard a Word that we'll come out on the other side mature and complete, lacking in nothing (James 1). I'd say that's worth the fight...just gotta remember that in the moment!

So now that I've finished scanning and had my therapeutic debreifng while listening to old school All For One...GOODNIGHT!

T.G.I.F.

Judah & I, at lunch...

Where's Matt? Map? No, Matt. Mah? No, MATT. Matt? Yes. Matt who? Your HUSBAND! (with a roll of his eyes) You mean, DADDY? Yes. He's at work. Where's Matthew? Matthew who? You know. (with a glimmer in his eye) Your daddy? Yes! At work, silly boy!

Judah started talking about a "raspberry cup" when we were talking about what kinds of fruits make different kinds of jelly. I asked him what a raspberry cup is. "It's raspberries all connected together with chocolate cake in the middle and icing on top and candles in it that you blow out for your birthday." Sounds yummy to me!!

Elijah came to snuggle in bed with Eden and I one morning when it was time to get up. Noticing a missing person, he asked, "Where's Daddy?" At work already. "Oh, before I even smelled the coffee on him." I guess Daddy's morning coffee is now a permanent part of the boys' day. :-)

Tippy Tuesday: Get Your Fix...At Home

I "forced" Matt to help me with this week's menu because, well, I wanted help. It gets tiring to come up with menu after menu -- lots of brain work, even with all the menus I've got stored up. One meal he came up with was to try chicken sandwiches of the Chick-fil-A type with waffle fries from the freezer section. So, we tried it! WOW! Not the exact recipe or anything, but it was close enough to definitely get our Chick-fil-A fix at home. And my best guestimate is that I fed four mouths and had 2 leftover servings for what one single combo meal would cost.

All I did was fillet boneless, skinless chicken breasts down to sandwich size. I cut several into nugget pieces for the boys. In one shallow dish, beat one egg with a tablespoon of milk. In another shallow dish, combine unseasoned bread crumbs, salt, pepper, paprika, and a touch of garlic powder to suit your fancy. (Sorry, I didn't measure!) Heat a thin layer of vegetable oil in a skillet over medium heat. Egg 'n bread the chicken and place it in the hot oil for a few minutes on each side. Drain on a paper towel. Then all you have to do is add in the bun, pickles, mayo, lettuce, and tomato. Ta da! Oh, and the waffle fries from the oven. :-) A bona fide Chick-fil-A fix...at home.

Now, for another fix at home, I bring you another Hubz In the Kitchen moment. :-) Matt has occasionally gotten a crazy notion to combine cranberry juice with ice cream. But he's never really done it (nor have I been on board). Until tonight. WOWSERS! Talk about a Sonic fix...at home. I used my fav cran-pomegranate and he used cran-cherry. A couple scoops of vanilla ice cream with a splash of juice. To borrow from Blue's Clues, "Stir it up, stir it up, stir it up tasty..." Mmmm! Seriously. Try it.

Monday Meditation: 5 D's

Duty & Drudgery. Desire & Daily.

One of the books I'm currently reading is Respectable Sins by Jerry Bridges. The women in my small group have just started going through it together, and it's been a book I've wanted to read for quite some time. Yeah for the "requirement" to now read it! :-) Today's meditation comes from one of the introductory chapters.

We are commanded to put sin to death. It is our duty to do so. But duty without desire soon produces drudgery. And it is the truth of the gospel, reaffirmed in our hearts daily, that puts desire into our duty. It is the gospel that stokes the fire of our motivation to deal with our respectable and subtle sins. It is the gospel that motivates us to seek to be in our daily experiences what we are in our standing before God.

(p. 36)

Over the years, I've had opportunity to have a few deep spiritual conversation in which I stepped on one of my soap boxes...that I dearly wish I would remember to stand on for myself every day! Faith is a choice we make each day. It goes along with the oft-heard quote Bridges mentions, "Preach the gospel to yourself every day." Yes, there is the initial step of faith in which salvation is brought to our souls by believing in Jesus Christ as our Savior from sin and death. But then there is the daily choice to have faith that Jesus Christ WILL continue His sanctifying work, ridding your soul's soil of the dead roots of sin.

Following are some questions that convict me -- I wish I thought about them every day!

-How often do I remember that I am not alone in my battle against sin? That I have been FREED from sin and do NOT have to succumb to it? That in my own power, I will fail over and over and over? That if I am led by the Spirit, I will walk by the Spirit? ::ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch:: ...ouch.

-As I move throughout my day, how often do I even think about Christ and what He did on the cross? Do I remind myself of the finality of His death and resurrection? That I am eternally forgiven for sins I haven't even committed yet?

-How often do I remember that He could come back for me in the very next breath I take? Or that I could meet Him in my sleep tonight? Now, think of that answer in light of how sinful I am each day.

-How often do I remember that the Holy Spirit is living WITHIN me, ready and willing to help me overcome the impatience, anger, laziness, selfishness, and pride that well up at a moment's notice?

-When I pray, why do I so often pray as if I'm talking to a God who is "out there" far away in heaven? If the Holy Spirit is within me, God is closer than "near" me! I think it is very unfortunate how many (including myself) are programmed to pray to God, as in God the Father. How often do I pray to God the Son, praising Him for what He did for me? How often do I pray to God the Holy Spirit, thanking Him for His comfort and guidance and asking for increasing conviction and purification?

-If God the Spirit is dwelling within me, why do I not see the ugliness of my sin all the more? Why do I not think this each day and use it to put desire in my duty to dig up and throw out the sin in my soul? The Most Holy of the universe living in an ugly, unkempt garden with unfathomable potential? Get to work, woman!!

Duty is done much more quickly and completely when desire is behind it!!!

Remembering Christ has saved me once for all and the Holy Spirit is walking with me in sanctification SHOULD put desire in my duty to eradicate sin. Battling sin is far to often a drudgery for me...because I don't remember my Savior often enough. It's too easy for life to choke out Life. Husband, kids, meals, laundry, dust, germs, appointments, friends, service, events, TV, email, Facebook, packing, lack of sleep, hormones, SIN... My life is packed. My brain seemingly overloaded. Or is it just not organized properly?

Enter the 5th D.

discipline.

::groooooaaaan:: I loath the word. Only because I know JUST how important it is to life and godliness. And how HARD it is to obtain.

I need to discipline my mind to remember the Gospel each day. Discipline my brain into thinking each day on what God has done for me, that I am already free from sin, that the Holy Spirit within me will help me choose righteousness each time I am tempted to sin, that getting rid of sin should be a daily desirous duty rather than a drudgery.

And I betcha that once I, with the Spirit's help, can discipline myself to remember the Gospel each day and have daily faith that Christ will continue His work in me, sin will fall OUT of place and everything else will fall INTO place. Where sin is absent, holy freedom reigns.

Rather than allowing life to choke out Life, I need to let Life run my life. Daily.

**EDIT**

Ok, so I wrote this post right after I read the opening quote. Then I finished reading the chapter. I was shocked to read the very same thoughts I had put in this post, especially concerning the Holy Spirit. What a beautiful affirmation of my thought process. See? Proof that He is living within me, helping me to grow. :-)

And one quote that made me laugh outloud...because it's soooo true: "If we are prone to sinful anger, there will be circumstances that trigger our anger." HA! Thanks for the three kids, Lord. ;-) He sure does know exactly what we need to sanctify us where we need sanctifyin' - amen?

T.G.I.F.

One morning as the boys were sitting on the couch, Judah noted that one of the van lights was "on." I checked, and it was simply the sun reflecting off one of the mirrors within the light's compartment -- very bright! I explained what it was and that you shouldn't stare at things that are so bright or it could hurt your eyes. I also told them that we shouldn't stare at the sun either because it could "burn" your eyes and you wouldn't be able to see anymore. Fast forward to after nap time... For some reason, Judah was summarizing my earlier teaching about not staring at the sun. I took the opportunity to to teach the boys that when someone can't see, they are called "blind." Judah said that when he opens his eyes really wide, he is blind. I corrected him and said that was "blurry" and not blind. I had them shut their eyes and said that when you are "blind," you can't see anything but darkness -- no light, shadows, shapes, etc. Judah popped his eyes open and said, "OH! So Daddy must have stared at the sun and gotten blind!" Ha!! Then I had to launch into explaining that, yes, Daddy can't see "anything" without his glasses, but he's not blind.

As I was about to throw away a chicken carcass while cleaning up from dinner, I said aloud what I was doing. The boys were in the kitchen and asked what a "car-ah-cuhs" is. I brought them over to the cutting board and explained that it's basically the skeleton of the chicken we ate for dinner, that it's the bones of a chicken. Judah: "The booooones?? Oh. So chicken comes from a chicken." Congratulations, son! :-)

Most people who know our family know which one of my sons can tend to be mischievous. If you call out for Elijah and he doesn't answer, you'd better find him fast. I went upstairs for maybe five minutes to put a basket of clothes on my bed. Came back down and saw Judah where I'd left the boys, but no sign of Elijah. "Elijah? ..... Elijah, where are you?" Still nothing. It was kind of eerie because usually there are sounds or signs of where he is, but I couldn't figure it out. So I walked around until I got all the way into the kitchen. There he was, hunkered as far into the refrigerator corner as a human can possibly be with the [cutest] big-eyed gasp-she-found-me expression on his face... and a huge chipmunk cheek. "What are you eating?" Silence. "Elijah, WHAT are you eating??" My mind was frantically coursing though what I may have left within reach on the counter -- but there was nothing. All sweets were out of reach. "Elijah, open your mouth." A huge ball of chewed up cheese was inside. "CHEESE??" He shook his head slowly as he continued trying to chew it all. I HAD to smile. Matter of fact, I giggled a little. Here was the classic hand-in-the-cookie-jar moment. And it was cheese. I asked him where he got it from, and he pointed to the meat/cheese drawer. I opened the trash and found the wrapper neatly laid inside. This kid knew exactly what he wanted and how to hide it. At least it was cheese, I guess. Good protein and calcium. :-) I asked him if he was hungry, and he pitifully said yes. "Sweetie, if you're hungry, just ask!"

Monday Meditations: Getting One Thing Straight

I got a very nice message from a dear college friend the other day. She's in a bit of a rough patch with a brood of little Warriors to raise as well as a new pregnancy complete with the fun symptoms. :-P Here's part of what she said...

So, I have a question for you! How do you do it all? I see all of your blog posts, menus, laundry tips, etc. and think...wow, I wish I was as talented as Dawn! I am a pretty organized person, but I just feel like you have it together so much better.

Let's get one thing straight... I. do. NOT. have. it. together. :-)

The problem with the virtual world is that we can pick and choose what we let others see. Granted, you can do that face to face with someone as well. But, ah, with the virtual world, editing of self is endless! Who in their right mind would post "I yelled at my son today just because he wouldn't go up the stairs when I told him to" or "I ate chips the other afternoon when I wasn't truly hungry" or "I was disgruntled when my husband said I couldn't get a new hamper for the boys' room" or "I napped for an hour and a half rather than a quick cat nap and then taking care of responsibilities" (See, four imperfections right off the top of my head...and there's a lot more I could post!) No, most of us, except for a few rare jewels of honesty, choose to post the tips, the funnies, the pictures, the Bible verses, and so on. Sure paints a pretty picture, huh?

I'd like to share my response to my sweet friend to help paint, not an ugly or pretty picture, but a PROPER picture...

Girl, there are SO many things I need to improve upon. What you see on my blog or FB is by God's grace, whether I learned it through Home Ec, other women or resources, or figured it out along the way.

I fail EVERY day. Misplaced priorities, laziness, anger/impatience with my boys... I could give you a laundry list of failures. I think we're only on week 7 or so of our preschool. And it's been 6 MONTHS since we started. :-P Laundry always piles up. Dusting happens maybe once a month. Bathrooms are cleaned every 2-3 weeks (maybe?). Menu planning is a chore -- ugh. I have good intentions to do things after bedtime, but once I sit to nurse Eden one last time, my body hits the "I'm actually sitting down and now I'm tired" wall.

So now that I've blown holes in how you apparently view me... ;-)

If I may borrow an old adage: Those who fail are those who fail to try.

And to add to that, we can only try and keep trying by God's strength. He's promised not to give us anything He won't also give us the tools and grit to handle. Very humbling to think of all He's blessed us with and then look at the job we are (or aren't) doing. We've been given amazing men to love, support, and aid in this life. We've been charged to raise human beings -- keep them alive and healthy as well as guide them spiritually to the Throne of Salvation. And if that wasn't enough responsibility, tack on home management, meal management, clothes management, cleaning, doc appointments, church stuff, etc. Sheeh! Almost seems like we've been set up to fail.

And yet God gave it all to us. Therefore, we CAN handle it. But only in HIS strength. Can't stress that enough for the both of us. By being His daughters, we're set up for success rather than failure. We just have to choose to take what is already there! (Wow, I think I'm preaching to myself!)

My mom has always told me "Just do the next thing" when I'm having a rough time physically or emotionally. This is definitely just a season for you. One that is well worth it since you're [insert your own personal struggle here]! Do what you can, ask for help, and let go of the rest. As long as your family is alive and healthy, that's what matters! People, including yourself, are more important than folded laundry or clean windows.

Let me raise my glass of lukewarm water while in my wrinkled shirt and spit-up, snotty jeans as I say: "Here's to wives and moms -- may we remember that our Father has set us up for success and not failure. We just have to choose to do it all for Him and that will put success in our grasp!"